David Stearns has officially discovered the one thing Mets fans already knew: 

There are no mulligans in Flushing. 

After the Mets finished 74-88 and dead last in the NL East, Stearns had to face the music. And naturally, the first question was the one every Mets fan has been screaming into their television for months:

“So, David… how’s that Pete Alonso decision working out for you?” 

Stearns was asked whether, knowing what he knows now, he would have taken a harder swing at bringing Alonso back. 

His answer? 

“I don’t get mulligans.” 

Translation: 

“Yeah… I might have screwed that one up.” 

And folks, when the guy running your baseball operation starts talking about mulligans, you know the golf cart is already headed toward the parking lot. 

The Mets decided last offseason that Pete Alonso was apparently too expensive, too risky and not worth bringing back. Instead, Stearns wanted to build the team around pitching, defense and something he called “run prevention.” 

Well… The Mets prevented plenty of runs from scoring — mostly their own.

Stearns even admitted Monday that he might have to retire the phrase “run prevention.” 

You know things went badly when your own baseball philosophy needs to enter witness protection. 

Meanwhile, Pete Alonso went to Baltimore and apparently decided to take his Mets revenge tour personally.

Alonso led the American League with 43 home runs and 113 RBIs, played every game for the third straight season and became the first player in MLB history to win an RBI crown in both leagues. 

Meanwhile, the Mets’ first basemen combined for: 

18 home runs.
77 RBIs.
A .667 OPS. 

That’s not a replacement for Pete Alonso. 

That’s a missing-person report. 

And Mets fans didn’t exactly let Alonso forget where he came from. 

When the Orioles came to Citi Field, Alonso received standing ovations before every at-bat. 

Then he hit his 300th career home run on September 15, tying the game for Baltimore in the ninth inning. 

And what did Mets fans do? 

They started chanting: 

“FIRE STEARNS!”

Pete Alonso couldn’t have written a better script if Hollywood handed him a pen. 

The Mets spent the offseason trying to convince everyone that they could replace Alonso. 

Instead, Alonso replaced the Mets in the postseason picture. 

That’s baseball karma with a Mets logo on it. 

And here’s where things get even crazier. 

The Mets opened the season with a $358 million payroll. 

THREE HUNDRED AND FIFTY-EIGHT MILLION DOLLARS! 

For that kind of money, I don’t want “encouraging signs.”

I want October baseball! 

I want champagne! 

I want my television remote covered in champagne! 

Instead, Mets fans got a 74-88 record, last place in the division and a 12-game losing streak in April that basically told us where this movie was going. 

And just when you thought the Mets couldn’t make things more uncomfortable, Juan Soto and Francisco Lindor spent significant time dealing with calf injuries. 

Soto finished with a .908 OPS, the second-lowest of his career. 

Lindor had career lows in batting average, OPS, RBIs and stolen bases.

That’s when you realize the Mets didn’t just have one problem. 

They had the entire problem section of the newspaper. 

To Stearns’ credit, there were some positives. 

The Mets played better down the stretch, going 27-22 after the August 3 trade deadline, and some of the young players gave fans something to actually get excited about. 

Carson Benge and A.J. Ewing combined for 31 home runs and 47 stolen bases, while rookie pitcher Nolan McLean finished with a 3.16 ERA in 31 starts. 

So there is talent coming. 

But now Stearns has to figure out what to do about first base, second base, the bullpen and the rotation. 

Oh, and there’s one other little thing: 

He has to convince Mets fans that he won’t make the Pete Alonso mistake again. 

Because when you let a franchise icon walk, watch him lead the American League in RBIs, watch your replacement production fall off a cliff and then finish in last place… 

Let’s just say the Mets fan base isn’t exactly handing out participation trophies. 

Stearns said the organization is “extraordinarily motivated” to make sure this never happens again.

Good. Because Mets fans have heard enough motivational speeches.

They want results. 

And if Stearns wants to talk about “run prevention” again, that’s fine.

Just make sure the Mets prevent one thing next season:

Another September spent watching everybody else play baseball.

Because Pete Alonso isn’t coming back to save you. 

The Polar Bear already escaped the zoo. 

And David Stearns? 

He’s got no mulligans left.